Mariposa Kisses (aka Dianne's Blog)

We all have our various idiosyncrasies. We think of them as quirks, inconveniences, or oddities that we’d rather do without. And yet, there is something about our differences that make us uniquely who we are. Sometimes, we wear these traits of divergence on the outside where they are most obvious to the world; however, at times, they go unseen, as they are worn on the inside.

Both cause personal discomfort, as we would prefer to match the symmetry of normalcy. And yet, would we be who we are if these foibles disappeared? For one, it might be an oversized feature; for another it might be an undersized feature. For your friend, it might be an issue of weight, either too gangly or too stout. For a relative, it might be a disfigurement or a birthmark, something that makes him or her stand out. And for a co-worker, perhaps, it is her hair that never quite does the right thing, or a complexion that is non-compliant. For another, it might be a less obvious weakness of sorts, such as a speech or hearing impediment.

What is your specific peculiarity, the thing that makes you uncomfortable and wanting to hide? Is it perhaps on the inside? Do you long to let go of some addiction that goes unnoticed by anyone besides yourself, or a thought that deeply entangles your mind? Do you obsess over things that others readily dismiss? Is your peculiarity an addiction to control, to fear, to busyness perhaps? Does some disability grip you from the inside, which you would rather do without?

Whichever eccentricity you wear, it is yours, as is that patterned shirt hanging in your closet…the one you just can’t get rid of, but that you never really want to wear. This is not to say that we can not change who we are, but it is to acknowledge that we all possess certain idiosyncrasies and that we are not alone. It might seem that Mrs. Brady down the street has it all together, with no flaws or shortcomings, but in truth, I think she has a few hidden up her sleeve. Or, it might feel that your difference is so remarkable that no-one could possibly relate to your feelings of defeat.

However, in reality, we are all flawed; we all contain some sort of imperfection. For me personally, more than one defect comes to mind. And though it is tempting to compare myself to someone else without my peculiarity, who perhaps looks or acts “better” than I do, it is the inappropriate place to turn. Magazines and television are likewise the wrong places to go to for pick-me-ups regarding self-worth; however, we frequently do turn to those resources for self-definition, usually for what we are not or for what we do not have.

The true source for proper personal identity is the Bible. Though I frequently forget to turn there first, when I do, I am adequately and lovingly reminded of who the Lord says I am. David prays out to God in Psalm 139: 13-16, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body…” Doesn’t that encourage you? Even when you are feeling frightfully disheartened, how can you not feel lifted up by those words? Contemplate the majesty that you are not a mistake because you were seen and formed by God himself in your mother’s womb. Think over how you were wonderfully and fearfully made. Your idiosyncrasy doesn’t appear quite so bleak after reading that verse, does it?

It’s not to say that Satan won’t keep throwing lies at you to discourage your spirit, but it is to say that “…the Spirit who lives in you is greater than the spirit who lives in the world” (1John 4:4). And it is wise to remember that you can “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you” (James 4:7).

For some of us, our idiosyncrasy might wane or retreat altogether. Today, there are many corrective options for our physical flaws or disparities; and yet, is it really the best option? Should we change our physical image to align ourselves more closely to that of the world? It’s not to say that some things should not be sought after; for example, being physically fit honors the Lord because it is an act of caring for the body he has given you, which is a gift. Paul says in Romans 12:1, “…offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.” So, clearly keeping our bodies in good shape is something that pleases God. And yet, if we make our outward appearance our primary goal for the purpose of looking good rather than being healthy, it seems that we are missing God’s point. For instance, the next verse in Romans 12 says, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” So, I think it is between each of us and the Lord to decide which flaws are to remain and which ones are to be refurbished. Ultimately, we must come to terms with who we are in HIM and trust him for our self-worth and value.

For those blemishes that are internal, we can definitely seek terrific professional counsel, but even then, it is important to remember that God is our ultimate Counselor, to whom we should turn for encouragement and truth. Isaiah 9:6 foreshadows Christ’s coming and says, “…And he will be called Wonderful Counselor…” Likewise, it is comforting to know that God will bring us to total completion once we are in heaven with HIM. Praise the Lord that he is not done with us yet, but that “…he who began a good work in (us) will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6).