Mariposa Kisses (aka Dianne's Blog)

It’s not that most of us readily admit it, but sometimes, we as moms feel we’ve been lost somewhere in one of our mountain-sized laundry piles. Or, maybe it’s in the massive abyss of toys filling our family rooms…or in the unending mound of dirty dishes on the left side of the sink that seemingly never ends. In actuality, the messes do disappear for a short while; we all know that deep sigh of relief when everything looks clean… for like five minutes, before the kids wake up and take it as their personal challenge to remove every toy you’ve recently put away. Later in the day, when you’ve actually made improvements on the laundry piles filling your hallway, your husband comes home, changes his clothes, and throws the old ones into yet one more new pile to be dealt with another day. Likewise, he places his lunch pail on your clean counter with more dishes inside that need washing. Even the dog takes part in the family’s scheme to mess up mom’s clean house as he shakes his hair all over the newly vacuumed sofa and drips water from his bowl onto the newly swept kitchen tile. And the cat…couldn’t that hairball have been avoided on the newly washed duvet cover? A clean house isn’t really what defines a mom… is it?

Even though we as moms know that we are not defined by our plethora of daily tasks and accomplishments, somewhere between our job as maid, chef, chauffeur, counselor, nurse, veterinarian, secretary, financial planner, landscaper, and personal shopper, we do get lost. Who are we really? Many moms, like myself, have resigned from goal-oriented academic pursuits or ambitious career paths to start a family. Certainly, the trade-offs have been worth it. I have two wonderful children and a third in the oven; my conviction that I’m doing the right thing by staying at home to raise my children is solid and couldn’t be stronger. And yet, I struggle with days of pensive questioning regarding my role in life…with days of wondering who I really am. Does society really value me? Does my family value me? Am I lost somewhere in that laundry pile that never seems to dissipate, no matter how fast I wash it?

On days when we struggle through our identities as moms, it is important to be reminded of God’s truths. When I am frazzled and exhausted, I am reminded of God’s word in Isaiah, “Those that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will mount up with wings as eagles; they will run and not grow weary” (Isaiah 40:31). Likewise, I think upon Paul’s encouragement in Philippians when he says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). And if my purpose is feeling uncertain, I am reminded of God’s promise in a previous chapter of Philippians that says, “Being confident of this that he who began a good work in you will carry it onto completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6).

In truth, the piles of laundry and dishes will never cease, though for short moments at a time. The pans will always need cleaning and the countertops to be wiped down. Daily, the weeds will grow taller along with your little ones at home. Your cars will need washing. Your kids will need taxi services. Your plants will need watering and your kids and spouse will need three meals per day prepared for a couple of decades at least. And at the end, you will have raised a family who loves you dearly. And you will be able to observe your children and spouse who are the people they are because of the woman you have been their whole lives. Keep up the good work wives and moms!