Mariposa Kisses (aka Dianne's Blog)

Life is not simply a “To Do” list, and yet there are always things to get done. Even our family conversations can revolve around the tasks which must be accomplished. Whether we are dealing with our spouse or with our kids, it can seem that all we talk about is the next day’s schedule or the events of the upcoming weekend. Was it dinner with the Clarks or lunch with the Johnsons? Did we commit to making brownies for the soccer party or was it the swim meet? Is it possible to take a break from the madness? In an ideal world, I’d say yes. But, we don’t really live in an ideal world, do we?

Even though we can’t change the world around us, we can change certain things within our own nuclear family. The vital word that comes to mind is prioritizing. The best I can suggest is to let certain things go, including some important activities and tasks. For example, do you really need to have a social activity for every segment of every weekend? Maybe you could go out to dinner Friday or Saturday night, but not both. Instead, you could get take-out one of the evenings and enjoy time with your family or maybe just with your spouse if the kids have other plans. Likewise, maybe you could decide to wash two loads of laundry instead of four, leaving the less favorable tees in a big pile; you'd have more time to read one chapter of that good book instead.

When it comes to tasks, everyone knows what it’s like to have sticky notes piled upon more sticky notes. Here’s the thing…you can rarely complete all of the tasks anyways, so after you write your lists, commit to doing half of them for the day. Then, at least you’ve got part of your list written for the next day. So, really, you’re ahead of even yourself. By prioritizing, you will have eliminated some feelings of exhaustion and chaos for those times when you’re doing too much. Some days will require ten sticky notes and maybe all the things on the list are crucial to the day. However, on most days, it seems like a few things can drop off the list and no one would even notice or care.

Try to do less so that you can enjoy the simple moments in life. Your toilets might not get cleaned every week, but hey, who’s in there to analyze the toilets anyways? Try to clean them every two weeks and make some time instead to read that magazine during the month actually listed on the cover. Also, we all need to make more time for our spouse. It’s time we make a date night and actually stick to it. Even if it’s just a movie rental at home, it’s a time that’s just for you guys, not for the necessary chores now that the kids have finally gone to bed. Even better though is to get a family member or babysitter to watch the kids during your date night, so you can get a break from it all.

Even when it comes to our kids, sometimes, we feel like we have to do things in order to spend time meaningfully together. Don’t get me wrong, going to the park, the mall, the beach…those can all be good things. However, hanging out at home in the backyard without an agenda can be equally fulfilling. Maybe the goal of doing nothing seems worthless in our on-the-go society, but it really has its value in the proper context. It’s not that we can just sit around doing nothing all the time, because then literally nothing would get done. There wouldn’t be any clean underwear in your drawer or any food in the fridge to eat. Yet, the occasional nothingness will effectively fuel us back up for all of our daily commitments.