Saturday, February 19, 2011
Excerpt #4, from pages 29/30, chapter 4 of Stream of Consciousness
I chopped more strawberries, hunted for pink boots, chatted Hubby, texted Mom to pray for Danielle’s cold, unloaded the dishwasher, switched the laundry over, and turned on some Jazz music. It was time for a little bit of boogying in the kitchen with the broom and the mop, of course. My philosophy was to enjoy the mundane tasks along the way. Why the heck not? I stepped, turned, twirled and even threw in a few dramatic kicks and leaps for some cardio. I’d already missed my morning jog and probably wouldn’t make it to the gym this evening either. I finally carried the strawberries up to Danielle and found her asleep with her gray and white stuffed kitty named Bingo. They looked so peaceful. I covered her with her purple blanket and headed back downstairs to finish up the mopping. But first, I had to pick up my cell phone. Who could it be?
“Hey Jen. How’s it going? I didn’t think it was you since we always just text instead. What’s up, Girl?” I questioned.
“I’m so in love, Renee. I couldn’t text. I just had to call you with the good news. I’m so happy,” she rambled.
“Wow, what is it Jen? Just spit it out already,” I requested.
“I’m so excited. I can hardly talk. I mean, we’ve only dated for like a week and a half. But… Jared is just so wonderful,” she cooed.
“Well, what the hell is it, Jen. Just tell me,” I barked nervously.
“We’re going to go on a cruise together. Apparently Jared’s company gave him these extra tickets. Well, he won them from a sale’s contest or something like that. So he asked me to go. He’s so nice though. He said we could get separate cabins if I wanted to. I told him we could just share one. I mean, he’s so romantic, even down to the room thing. Ahhh, this is going to be so fun. Caribbean here we come,” she squealed like a fat swine.
“Wow, Jen. I’m so happy for you. That’s really exciting. Do you think you should go on a cruise so soon? When do you set sail?” I asked apprehensively.
“We leave this weekend. I know it’s pretty short notice, but he’d been thinking of asking me for the past few days and told me that the snorkeling is to die for.”
“Are you sure it’s safe? I mean, you’ve only known Jared for a week.”
“Nine days, actually,” she retorted defensively.
“Whatever Renee. I just told you my most exciting news of the year and you just rain on my parade. I should’ve called Ashley instead. She’s a way better listener than you are anyways,” she huffed.
“Don’t say that Jen. You know I’m happy for you. I just want to make sure you’re gonna be okay. I mean, leaving the country with a guy you hardly know. It seems a little bit strange, don’t you think?”
“The Caribbean is US territory, you idiot. It’s barely leaving the country anyways.”
“Actually a lot of it is international and some of it’s British, but whatever. I know you’re a smart girl and that you’ll have a great time. I just wanted to act as a sounding board of reason, that’s all.”
“Oh my gosh Renee. You sound like a book. Can’t you just stop for a second and be my friend? And I’m not a girl. I’m a thirty-five year old woman. I can make my own choices. You’re not my mom, you know. You’re supposed to be my friend,” she yelled.
Click.
Wow. That was crazy. But not too far from what I’d expect from Jen. She’s such a hot-head. It drives me nuts. Like I don’t have enough crap to deal with mothering my own three children. She has to tag on like one more bratty kid. Dammit, why is she such an idiot? At least she didn’t say she was getting married. For a second, I thought I was going to have to play the part of the world’s least motivated matron of honor ever recorded in history. Oh thank you God. Thank you that Jen is not marrying Jared.
I heard a beep on my phone and read my text:
Sorry. Shouldn’t have yelled at u. Just wanted u 2 be happy 4 me. I really like Jared and I can tell he’s not some crazy killer. He just wants to spoil me. Is that a crime? 2 be happy? Is that so bad? Anyways… luv u. Write bk so I know u got this.
I texted back a thousand words a second:
I forgive u. Just trying to talk some sense into u. Of course I want u to be happy. I also want to make sure my best friend is going to be safe with an almost complete stranger. Just try to c my side on this. Make sure I get copies of your itinerary and take your phone with you. We’ll chat more 2morrow. Love u. Hugs—renee
My goodness. I can’t believe it’s already eleven thirty. Five hours after waking up, I have added one paragraph to my nature piece. My book still sits in its lonely folder, unedited and naked. Poor baby. Maybe if I just give it a title, that will get my mind rolling. What about “Simon Says?” That’s how I could start it out, playing Simon Says with the kids while cooking dinner in my kitchen. I mean, the protagonist could be playing the game, of course. Not me. But whatever, it’s okay to squeeze myself into each piece I write at least a little bit.
I heard the key turn in the door and knew it was Eric. He walked in with flowers, some French bread, and a bottle of Kendall Jackson Merlot.
“Hey Jen. How’s it going? I didn’t think it was you since we always just text instead. What’s up, Girl?” I questioned.
“I’m so in love, Renee. I couldn’t text. I just had to call you with the good news. I’m so happy,” she rambled.
“Wow, what is it Jen? Just spit it out already,” I requested.
“I’m so excited. I can hardly talk. I mean, we’ve only dated for like a week and a half. But… Jared is just so wonderful,” she cooed.
“Well, what the hell is it, Jen. Just tell me,” I barked nervously.
“We’re going to go on a cruise together. Apparently Jared’s company gave him these extra tickets. Well, he won them from a sale’s contest or something like that. So he asked me to go. He’s so nice though. He said we could get separate cabins if I wanted to. I told him we could just share one. I mean, he’s so romantic, even down to the room thing. Ahhh, this is going to be so fun. Caribbean here we come,” she squealed like a fat swine.
“Wow, Jen. I’m so happy for you. That’s really exciting. Do you think you should go on a cruise so soon? When do you set sail?” I asked apprehensively.
“We leave this weekend. I know it’s pretty short notice, but he’d been thinking of asking me for the past few days and told me that the snorkeling is to die for.”
“Are you sure it’s safe? I mean, you’ve only known Jared for a week.”
“Nine days, actually,” she retorted defensively.
“Whatever Renee. I just told you my most exciting news of the year and you just rain on my parade. I should’ve called Ashley instead. She’s a way better listener than you are anyways,” she huffed.
“Don’t say that Jen. You know I’m happy for you. I just want to make sure you’re gonna be okay. I mean, leaving the country with a guy you hardly know. It seems a little bit strange, don’t you think?”
“The Caribbean is US territory, you idiot. It’s barely leaving the country anyways.”
“Actually a lot of it is international and some of it’s British, but whatever. I know you’re a smart girl and that you’ll have a great time. I just wanted to act as a sounding board of reason, that’s all.”
“Oh my gosh Renee. You sound like a book. Can’t you just stop for a second and be my friend? And I’m not a girl. I’m a thirty-five year old woman. I can make my own choices. You’re not my mom, you know. You’re supposed to be my friend,” she yelled.
Click.
Wow. That was crazy. But not too far from what I’d expect from Jen. She’s such a hot-head. It drives me nuts. Like I don’t have enough crap to deal with mothering my own three children. She has to tag on like one more bratty kid. Dammit, why is she such an idiot? At least she didn’t say she was getting married. For a second, I thought I was going to have to play the part of the world’s least motivated matron of honor ever recorded in history. Oh thank you God. Thank you that Jen is not marrying Jared.
I heard a beep on my phone and read my text:
Sorry. Shouldn’t have yelled at u. Just wanted u 2 be happy 4 me. I really like Jared and I can tell he’s not some crazy killer. He just wants to spoil me. Is that a crime? 2 be happy? Is that so bad? Anyways… luv u. Write bk so I know u got this.
I texted back a thousand words a second:
I forgive u. Just trying to talk some sense into u. Of course I want u to be happy. I also want to make sure my best friend is going to be safe with an almost complete stranger. Just try to c my side on this. Make sure I get copies of your itinerary and take your phone with you. We’ll chat more 2morrow. Love u. Hugs—renee
My goodness. I can’t believe it’s already eleven thirty. Five hours after waking up, I have added one paragraph to my nature piece. My book still sits in its lonely folder, unedited and naked. Poor baby. Maybe if I just give it a title, that will get my mind rolling. What about “Simon Says?” That’s how I could start it out, playing Simon Says with the kids while cooking dinner in my kitchen. I mean, the protagonist could be playing the game, of course. Not me. But whatever, it’s okay to squeeze myself into each piece I write at least a little bit.
I heard the key turn in the door and knew it was Eric. He walked in with flowers, some French bread, and a bottle of Kendall Jackson Merlot.
Labels: postmodern novel
