Mariposa Kisses (aka Dianne's Blog)

2013 inches closer and that means a plethora of New Year’s resolutions. Blah, blah, blah, about five years ago, I decided to quit setting new goals (at least not on New Year's Day). Why get so serious with little lists and bullet points on a day that is supposed to be both relaxing and fun? But most people settle in to a meditative state of resolve and determination to do more of this or that. Truth be told, most women obsess, about one thing: losing weight. You’ve tried it all! Smoothie diets, soup diets, packaged meals, juicing, protein diets, diet pills, starvation, surgeries, and the list goes on ad nauseum. Then you read an article that inspires the next amazing diet plan and dive in head first, buying new workout clothes and fancy equipment. You dream of fitting into that polka-dot bikini by summertime because that’s only six months away and you’ve already booked your non-refundable Caribbean cruise. The smell of sunscreen takes over and you can practically taste the margaritas. Let's get started with a few servings of perspective. Fitting back into those cute floral shorts from college doesn’t have to be this year’s New Year’s resolution just because you probably won't fit into that little black dress for the Christmas office party (in a few weeks). Did I forget those skinny jeans and how you’d like to launch them into your outdoor fire pit? I say, grab the cute floral shorts, the little black dress, those damn skinny jeans, oh and that adorable bikini--- put them in an airtight bag down in a hole in the basement, and pretend that they no longer exist. Maybe you’ll fit into them by summer, but maybe not. How about one day at a time? Get started on your fat-loss journey with three basic steps: First, eat less fat. Our culture tells you that you'll be happier if you're so skinny that you can't eat any of the foods you actually love. Most ads tell you that you can be a mom and wear a size 1. But isn’t it refreshing when a commercial shows a mom who actually looks like she's had a few kids? The truth is, most people who really eat three balanced meals per day aren’t going to look like a runway model. And who decided that 105 pounds was the new normal, anyways? So don't ditch the foods you love, just eat half as much of them. If you feel pressured to eat everything on your plate, store half of the meal in a container in the fridge before you start eating. (You can always eat more later if you’re still hungry.) When you crave steak and mashed potatoes, eat half of the amount of buttery potatoes that you normally consume. And to ensure you don’t starve to death, add some of your favorite steamed veggies, like carrots or asparagus. Avoid some of the bad stuff by snacking on the good stuff between meals; that way, you never feel famished. Grab some lightly salted almonds or a handful of raisins instead of chips. Or blend up a smoothie with your favorite fruit, low-fat yogurt, and protein powder to carry you over until dinner. When you do crave a candy bar, don’t deprive yourself! Just split it into thirds and share with a few friends instead of eating the whole thing yourself. And remember to reward yourself with a cup of frozen yogurt at the end of the day (if you worked out, more on that down below). Second, set reasonable exercise goals. Try to exercise five times per week but don't overdo it. Record workouts every month so you can chart your progress (jog, cycle, walk, step class, etc). Make sure it all counts! Write down the 10-minute jog and the fun stuff too, like 15 minutes out on the trampoline with the kids or 20 minutes of soccer after dinner. There’s no rule that says you can’t split up your 20 minute walk either, one in the morning and one after work. I used to think a workout only counted if it was an hour or two at the gym. But then I'd skip working out altogether, since I didn't have enough time. Instead of spending 90 minutes at the gym, set a reasonable goal, like 10-15 minutes of moderate exercise five days per week for the first few weeks. Then increase it to 20 or 30 minutes the following month. This gradual regimen helps you to steer clear of shin splints, sore muscles, and discouragement. Third, know who you are. Regardless of age, weight, or skin color, you must declare your self-worth from within. And that starts with the surrender of your heart, body, and mind to a new voice of hope and acceptance. Write sticky notes on your kitchen cupboards: “I’m lovable,” “I’m hot,” or “I’m valuable the way I am.” Ask a friend to text you every day at 2pm when you’re tempted to eat that bag of cookies instead of an apple: “U r amazing!” Look for a different person in the mirror. After a few kids, you’re probably going to have bigger thighs and a few stretch marks. Choose to let go of the lies that say you are too ugly or lumpy to find peace and happiness. Instead, embrace a sense of self confidence that doesn't have to come from other people's accolades of your physical beauty. Let people see your emotional and spiritual strengths as well, which are based upon the values of the heart. It's not wrong to aim for balanced health goals, but make sure you're doing it for yourself and not for someone else. That person you’re trying so hard to impress might never be satisfied because she is dealing with her own issues, not yours. And don’t remain lost in that fifth grader’s comment about your height or weight from the past; it’s time to move on. Sometimes, you even fight to be “good enough” for someone who already thinks you’re great. Embody a healthier lifestyle and a happier you because you feel worthy enough to change--- for yourself.