Friday, July 24, 2009

 

Remembering Mom

Sometimes we get so busy with our lives that we forget to make time for our own mom. Our kids, spouse, work, and home cry out for our attention at every moment of the day. My kids literally demand all of me. Whether it's help on the potty, a sippy-cup refill, or a story to read together, it's never ending. Likewise, the laundry piles are toppling over and the dishes are all but jumping out of the sink themselves.

So, when my mom comes for a visit, it's easy to put her on the back-burner. She doesn't mind because she sees that everything is crazy and responds by helping me out while she's here. I love when Mom comes because my stove always gets cleaned and she teaches my middle daughter how to fold laundry.

I've been blessed to have Mom living only two hours away from me, but even with that fairly close distance, we only get to visit a limited number of times per year. Recently, I decided it was time for a special weekend to honor my mother.

My twin sister and I arranged a celebration weekend with our mom and a close friend. After an enjoyable and relaxing lunch at a favorite Italian restaurant, we headed to a tranquil winery, where we conversed and sampled flavorful wines. The night ended with a sleep-over at my sister's house where we watched movies until one or two in the morning. We had so much fun basking in the quiet moments and soaking up the lazy schedule.

Similarly, during a recent visit with Mom at my house, I decided that I wanted to set aside more time just for her. I limited my tasks in order to make her a priority. Even though the kids and chores begged for me to attend to them instead, I was able to steal a few quality moments with Mom. We enjoyed a flavorful glass of Merlot together at the end of the day. Likewise, I took advantage of more opportunities to sit and chat on the sofa and savored our quiet morning hours together before the chaos began.

Before Mom arrived, I called her and asked her to bring one of her favorite coffee mugs so that we could trade them as reminders of one another. She loaned me her "I love Mom" mug and I gave her my "Dianne" mug. It's remarkable how much this trade has meant to both of us even after a few short days.

We spoke yesterday and she told me "I'm using your mug today." I reiterated to her how much I've enjoyed using hers as well. Since we both love coffee, it's especially sweet to think of one another in this context. I know we're both drinking a fresh cup of strong brew in the morning and it makes me feel like we're closer.

Maybe you could trade something special with your mom as well. It could be a mug or a wine glass. Or you could exchange a place-mat, a juice pitcher, or a vase. As long as it is valuable to both of you and it makes you think of one another, then it's a worthwhile swap.

Since life is so short and our moms are so important to us, we need to make quality time for them. Life will always demand too much of us. Things will never really slow down. So, we just have to pull over to the side of the road and put on the brakes. This means that some things won't get done. But, the special memories with Mom will be etched in your heart forever. Some day when she's passed on, you'll be glad you wasted some time catching up with her.

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