Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Simple Moments
Life is not simply a "To Do" list, and yet there are a plethora of daily
projects to accomplish. Even our family conversations revolve around the tasks which must be completed. Whether we are dealing with our spouse or with our kids, it seems that all we talk about is the next day's schedule or the events of the upcoming weekend. Was it dinner with the Clarks or lunch with the Johnsons? Did we commit to making brownies for the soccer party or was it cookies for the swim meet? In an ideal world, I'd say we could suspend this cycle of madness. But, we don't live in a utopia, do we?
Even though we can't change the chaos around us, we can alter certain patterns within our own nuclear family. The vital word that comes to mind is "prioritizing". We must learn to let certain things go, including some important activities and objectives.
Do you really need to have a social activity for every segment of the weekend? Maybe you could go out to dinner Friday or Saturday night, but not both. Instead, you could make a quiet dinner at home for one of the evenings while enjoying quality time with your family. During the week, you might wash one load of laundry per day instead of three, leaving the less favorable tees in a big pile. This would give you more time to catch up on that political article you've been dying to read.
When it comes to the daily grind, everyone knows what it's like to have sticky notes
piled up high in tower formations. Truth be told, you can rarely complete all of the
chores anyways, so after you write your list, commit to doing only half of it. Then, at least you've got part of your list written for the next day.
By prioritizing, you will have eliminated some feelings of exhaustion and insanity for those times when you're doing too much. Some days will require ten sticky notes and all will be crucial to the day. However, on most days, a few errands could drop off the list and no one would even notice or care. Does Muffy really need grooming services every two weeks; what about every four instead? Do your kids actually benefit from being in three sports every quarter or would one per season suffice?
Try to do less so that you can enjoy more, especially the simple moments in life. Your toilets might not get cleaned every week, but who's in there to analyze them anyways? Try to disinfect them every two weeks while instead making time to catch up with a neighbor over a refreshing cup of iced tea. You could discuss a favorite movie or book instead of the recycled topics, such as the front yard's landscaping or the week's carpool schedule.
We also need to make more time for our spouse. It's time we make a date night and
actually stick to it. Even if it's just a movie rental and a candle-lit dinner while the kids watch their movie upstairs, it should be a treasured time just for the two of you. We're tempted to use every free minute for accomplishing goals; however, if the kids are asleep, it's time for relaxing and snuggling. Even though the laundry won't wash itself, date night is a sacred time where you show your loved one that you value him or her.
Even when it comes to our kids, we feel like we have to do things in order to spend
meaningful time together. Going to the park, the mall, and the beach are all fun and good endeavors. However, hanging out at home in the backyard without an agenda can be equally fulfilling. Maybe the goal of doing nothing seems worthless in our on-the-go society; however, in the context of slowing down, nothingness really has tremendous value.
It's not that we can bathe in idleness all the time, because then literally nothing would get done. There wouldn't be any clean underwear in your drawers or any food in the fridge for breakfast. Likewise, the kids' homework and school schedules need to be maintained and the bills must be paid. Yet, the occasional nothingness will effectively refuel us for our daily commitments. The value of a simple life is priceless.
projects to accomplish. Even our family conversations revolve around the tasks which must be completed. Whether we are dealing with our spouse or with our kids, it seems that all we talk about is the next day's schedule or the events of the upcoming weekend. Was it dinner with the Clarks or lunch with the Johnsons? Did we commit to making brownies for the soccer party or was it cookies for the swim meet? In an ideal world, I'd say we could suspend this cycle of madness. But, we don't live in a utopia, do we?
Even though we can't change the chaos around us, we can alter certain patterns within our own nuclear family. The vital word that comes to mind is "prioritizing". We must learn to let certain things go, including some important activities and objectives.
Do you really need to have a social activity for every segment of the weekend? Maybe you could go out to dinner Friday or Saturday night, but not both. Instead, you could make a quiet dinner at home for one of the evenings while enjoying quality time with your family. During the week, you might wash one load of laundry per day instead of three, leaving the less favorable tees in a big pile. This would give you more time to catch up on that political article you've been dying to read.
When it comes to the daily grind, everyone knows what it's like to have sticky notes
piled up high in tower formations. Truth be told, you can rarely complete all of the
chores anyways, so after you write your list, commit to doing only half of it. Then, at least you've got part of your list written for the next day.
By prioritizing, you will have eliminated some feelings of exhaustion and insanity for those times when you're doing too much. Some days will require ten sticky notes and all will be crucial to the day. However, on most days, a few errands could drop off the list and no one would even notice or care. Does Muffy really need grooming services every two weeks; what about every four instead? Do your kids actually benefit from being in three sports every quarter or would one per season suffice?
Try to do less so that you can enjoy more, especially the simple moments in life. Your toilets might not get cleaned every week, but who's in there to analyze them anyways? Try to disinfect them every two weeks while instead making time to catch up with a neighbor over a refreshing cup of iced tea. You could discuss a favorite movie or book instead of the recycled topics, such as the front yard's landscaping or the week's carpool schedule.
We also need to make more time for our spouse. It's time we make a date night and
actually stick to it. Even if it's just a movie rental and a candle-lit dinner while the kids watch their movie upstairs, it should be a treasured time just for the two of you. We're tempted to use every free minute for accomplishing goals; however, if the kids are asleep, it's time for relaxing and snuggling. Even though the laundry won't wash itself, date night is a sacred time where you show your loved one that you value him or her.
Even when it comes to our kids, we feel like we have to do things in order to spend
meaningful time together. Going to the park, the mall, and the beach are all fun and good endeavors. However, hanging out at home in the backyard without an agenda can be equally fulfilling. Maybe the goal of doing nothing seems worthless in our on-the-go society; however, in the context of slowing down, nothingness really has tremendous value.
It's not that we can bathe in idleness all the time, because then literally nothing would get done. There wouldn't be any clean underwear in your drawers or any food in the fridge for breakfast. Likewise, the kids' homework and school schedules need to be maintained and the bills must be paid. Yet, the occasional nothingness will effectively refuel us for our daily commitments. The value of a simple life is priceless.
Labels: moms, simple life, slow down
