Mariposa Kisses (aka Dianne's Blog)

Sometimes the smallest goals can turn into tumbleweeds of effectiveness. If you make a tiny goal and actually attain it, you feel motivated to set another goal. If you achieve that one, you subsequently go for something bigger after that. The tumbleweed eventually grows so large that it takes over your neighborhood. Just kidding, but it could take over your life. Start out small and see what happens.

Here's an example. You have ten grand on your credit card and it feels like you just can't tackle it. You're making minimum payments but your additional charges keep augmenting the total balance. There's the unexpected car repair or the higher utility bill from running the a/c non-stop. Here's the plan: pay off the minimum amount plus fifty to one hundred extra dollars per month. That might not sound like a lot, but after ten months, you've paid down an extra $500-$1000. The key here is budgeting your expenses out so that you don't have to charge the extra stuff. If you've got a bit of a cushion, then you can use it for those unplanned incidentals.

If your goal is to pay off $500 extra per month, it might be too overwhelming. That's why I suggest starting out small. If your efforts turn into something even greater, then run with it. It just seems like a lot of people get defeated by their own great intentions and then end up deflated and left for dead. As the financial adviser Dave Ramsey suggests, pay down your lowest debts first, no matter what the interest rates. Then, you'll experience a snowball effect of enthusiasm. The result: you'll pay off more debt even faster. He'd even challenge you to pay off your house. Can you imagine not having a house payment? Amazing.

Another area of goal-setting deals with health. If you aim to lose five pounds, maybe you'll actually stick to it. No matter how much potential weight you have to lose, ten, twenty, or thirty pounds, just start slowly. If you set out to lose five pounds and actually accomplish the goal, you'll feel so proud of yourself that you'll keep at it. The next round might include five more pounds of weight-loss and then simply maintaining that weight for awhile.

Set realistic terms, so that you'll actually accomplish your goal. You can start out with a simple four step plan: 1) stop eating when you're full, 2) exercise three times a week (after consulting with your doctor if necessary), 3) try to substitute breakfast or lunch for a protein-packed breakfast bar or smoothie, and 4) try to limit your dessert consumption or that tasty glass of wine to every other night ('cuz those calories get pretty sneaky, especially when you're tired).

Maybe you've gone through a divorce or haven't quite found that dashing someone yet. Are you ready to get back out there and polish up those dancing shoes? Why not make a really basic goal and just see what happens? For starters, you could ask your good friends if there's someone they think of pairing you up with for a blind date. If you're not in to that kind of a scenario, then there's always E-harmony or other online dating services. You could set up two profiles next week and see if anything comes of it. That's it, something simple. Then, if something great happens, your confidence improves and you get out there the following month for that double date to the Jazz concert in the park. Think of the possibilities. If you don't swing the bat, you'll never hit the ball.

For those who are not single, maybe you need a bit more romance or connection in your own marriage or dating relationship. Go for baby steps there as well. Try making a date-night and actually sticking to it. This is a time where the two of you catch up together. Talk. Snuggle. Play a game. Watch a movie. Just make it your time. My husband and I rent a movie pretty much every Tuesday night, which might sound fairly boring. But, it's a special time where we know we're going to hang out, no matter what. A good friend of mine actually goes out every week for her date-night. I'm always amazed to hear about their exciting adventures.

Petite goals for your own personal development are great as well. Since I'm a writer, I submit articles to every possible venue on the planet. I'm not a vet, but I can write about my own cat, so I got a piece accepted to I Love Cats magazine. I'm a woman who values my faith, so I wrote a piece for Today's Christian Woman magazine. Sure, I get tons of rejections, but if I don't put myself out there, then I don't get any acceptances either. Likewise, I've enjoyed writing my own blog for three years now. Even before anyone actually read it, it felt good just to maintain that dream, which eventually snow-balled into bigger things.

Maybe your passion is photography. Why not take some shots and approach a local coffee shop to see if you could display a few pieces. Start out small. Maybe you could turn some of your images into greeting cards with your website printed on the back. It might not start out as an exhibition, but if the right person sees your work, it could lead to bigger opportunities. Your self confidence will increase and you'll set further objectives for your artwork as well.

Are you a talented musician? You could list yourself as a part-time instructor on Craig's List or at some local community centers. If you love being onstage, you could approach some coffee shops or some other public arenas for testing out your musical gift. If you're unsure of your musical prowess, then it's time to make one small step by signing up for beginning music lessons. Don't just limit yourself to singing in the shower. Don't let your kids' Barney guitar be the only one you strum. Keep it real by being true to yourself. Motivate yourself to sign up for a six week session. You might even love it and advance to level 2.

We'd love to hear from you. Have you set any small goals that turned into adventurous success stories? Encourage someone else by sharing your thoughts here.

Labels: goals, kids, parents