Tuesday, June 01, 2010
Preparing Our Kids for the Future
As parents, we should encourage our kids toward their specific goals. But, first we have to help them figure out what those goals are. They're passionate about a variety of things, from their academic classes and sports, to their extracurricular activities or religious commitments. Which ones are the most important? Which ones will match up with their greatest potential? As their moms and dads, we get to evaluate those strengths while helping them draw out an exciting picture of their professional future.
Eventually, they will graduate from high school and move on to a career and/or a family. So, let's give them some tools to evaluate their future while they are young. But, how do we get started? Shaping our kids' career goals might seem like a mighty task, but it doesn't have to be daunting. It can actually be pretty simple and fun as well. Here are four suggestions to get you started.
First, spend some quality time with your kid. Even though you already know your own kid pretty well, ask her what she loves to spend her time doing. Ask why she loves that particular subject or activity and make sure she's pursuing it because of her passion, not yours. Get to know her by talking about some of her favorite magazines or websites. You could even ask about some upcoming movie titles as you evaluate her interests: adventures, dramas, action flicks, mysteries, etc.
Part of this exercise also helps to strengthen your understanding of what she's already good at...math, science, art, soccer, etc. It's likely that some of her natural talents will line up with some of her future goals. Discuss her end-of-the-year projects and the outcome of her final exams. Take the time to connect so you can both be on the same page. Some parents might assume their kid will be an architect but what if he does poorly at math and art? Doesn't sound like a fit.
Second, brainstorm with your child about some possible career choices to get the ideas flowing. Talk about what a love for art could turn into: a painter, a graphic designer, or a movie producer, etc. Discuss the possibilities of a career as a scientist: an astronomer, an oceanographer, or a geologist. Visit some fun science websites together, such as NASA's website (www.nasa.gov) which explores various scientific facets, including astronomical and oceanographic studies.
If your son loves firetrucks, talk to him about what firefighters do and see if he has similar interests. Maybe he loves to swim; so, you could discuss the duties of the US Coast Guard or a potential career as a dolphin trainer. If your child's favorite activity is to observe and listen to others, you could talk about the variety of jobs that are offered to professional counselors via schools, hospitals, military branches, and even through the financial sector.
Third, keep it real. Ask your kids what they want to be when they grow up. Describe some different career choices that you considered when you were young. As you do this, discuss your own career path while showing them how you came to your decision. Remember to include your honest evaluation of your own professional decisions. Maybe you love your job; maybe you don't. Let them know how you really feel.
Talk to them about the reality that many people make a variety of career choices over their lifetime. Allow them to see that they can apply multiple interests over the years and that they don't have to feel limited by one plan. For example, my kids know that I used to be a Spanish professor before they were born, but now understand how I have modified my career goals to be at home with them as a freelance writer while they are young.
Fourth, give them practical ways to see those careers in action. Allow their inexperienced eyes to glance at a variety of professional environments. If your kids seem interested in art, fan the flame by taking them to some local art museums this summer. If you're up for a drive to Los Angeles, check out the Getty Museum where admission is always free (http://www.getty.edu/museum/).
Perhaps your kid is a digger and a builder, so your summer visit might include a stop through a model home development or a visit to some downtown skyscrapers. If your daughter loves animals and wants to be a vet, line up some visits to your city's animal rescue center or drive down to San Diego to visit the Wild Animal Park or the Zoo (http://www.sandiegozoo.org/).
Maybe your child loves to ham it up on the pretend microphone all day long; so, you could take him or her for a visit to a local radio station. Who knows, your kid might end up as the next announcer for your favorite sport's team. Free tickets anyone? If it's close to impossible to reach the big-wigs from a major radio station, try a junior college or university near you, where access might be easier.
Even though your children may not pursue their childhood interests as adults, motivating them as kids gives them enthusiasm for the future. Just helping them to evaluate the idea of being a professional someday is a great start. It allows them to dream big and to see their own potential. Think of some kids you knew growing up who never thought they would amount to much. Imagine if their parents had invested a little bit more time and energy into their future.
For older kids, it's especially important that they understand the preparation involved for certain careers. Talk to them about the need for a good high school record, so that they can get into a decent college. Share with them how a college degree is a basic requirement for many professions now. If they can see these things ahead of time, hopefully they'll perform accordingly.
Your care for their passions and your interest in their preparedness shows them love and support. So, even if your kid doesn't end up as a future president of the United States, her dream and the endless array of imaginary speeches will prepare her for life as a successful adult regardless of the altered career path. She may even choose to do what you've done because she's seen the love you've had for your own job over the years.
Whatever comes out of these suggestions, never underestimate the investment you make in your child's future. Share some of your son or daughter's passions and dreams. We'd love to hear from you.
Eventually, they will graduate from high school and move on to a career and/or a family. So, let's give them some tools to evaluate their future while they are young. But, how do we get started? Shaping our kids' career goals might seem like a mighty task, but it doesn't have to be daunting. It can actually be pretty simple and fun as well. Here are four suggestions to get you started.
First, spend some quality time with your kid. Even though you already know your own kid pretty well, ask her what she loves to spend her time doing. Ask why she loves that particular subject or activity and make sure she's pursuing it because of her passion, not yours. Get to know her by talking about some of her favorite magazines or websites. You could even ask about some upcoming movie titles as you evaluate her interests: adventures, dramas, action flicks, mysteries, etc.
Part of this exercise also helps to strengthen your understanding of what she's already good at...math, science, art, soccer, etc. It's likely that some of her natural talents will line up with some of her future goals. Discuss her end-of-the-year projects and the outcome of her final exams. Take the time to connect so you can both be on the same page. Some parents might assume their kid will be an architect but what if he does poorly at math and art? Doesn't sound like a fit.
Second, brainstorm with your child about some possible career choices to get the ideas flowing. Talk about what a love for art could turn into: a painter, a graphic designer, or a movie producer, etc. Discuss the possibilities of a career as a scientist: an astronomer, an oceanographer, or a geologist. Visit some fun science websites together, such as NASA's website (www.nasa.gov) which explores various scientific facets, including astronomical and oceanographic studies.
If your son loves firetrucks, talk to him about what firefighters do and see if he has similar interests. Maybe he loves to swim; so, you could discuss the duties of the US Coast Guard or a potential career as a dolphin trainer. If your child's favorite activity is to observe and listen to others, you could talk about the variety of jobs that are offered to professional counselors via schools, hospitals, military branches, and even through the financial sector.
Third, keep it real. Ask your kids what they want to be when they grow up. Describe some different career choices that you considered when you were young. As you do this, discuss your own career path while showing them how you came to your decision. Remember to include your honest evaluation of your own professional decisions. Maybe you love your job; maybe you don't. Let them know how you really feel.
Talk to them about the reality that many people make a variety of career choices over their lifetime. Allow them to see that they can apply multiple interests over the years and that they don't have to feel limited by one plan. For example, my kids know that I used to be a Spanish professor before they were born, but now understand how I have modified my career goals to be at home with them as a freelance writer while they are young.
Fourth, give them practical ways to see those careers in action. Allow their inexperienced eyes to glance at a variety of professional environments. If your kids seem interested in art, fan the flame by taking them to some local art museums this summer. If you're up for a drive to Los Angeles, check out the Getty Museum where admission is always free (http://www.getty.edu/museum/).
Perhaps your kid is a digger and a builder, so your summer visit might include a stop through a model home development or a visit to some downtown skyscrapers. If your daughter loves animals and wants to be a vet, line up some visits to your city's animal rescue center or drive down to San Diego to visit the Wild Animal Park or the Zoo (http://www.sandiegozoo.org/).
Maybe your child loves to ham it up on the pretend microphone all day long; so, you could take him or her for a visit to a local radio station. Who knows, your kid might end up as the next announcer for your favorite sport's team. Free tickets anyone? If it's close to impossible to reach the big-wigs from a major radio station, try a junior college or university near you, where access might be easier.
Even though your children may not pursue their childhood interests as adults, motivating them as kids gives them enthusiasm for the future. Just helping them to evaluate the idea of being a professional someday is a great start. It allows them to dream big and to see their own potential. Think of some kids you knew growing up who never thought they would amount to much. Imagine if their parents had invested a little bit more time and energy into their future.
For older kids, it's especially important that they understand the preparation involved for certain careers. Talk to them about the need for a good high school record, so that they can get into a decent college. Share with them how a college degree is a basic requirement for many professions now. If they can see these things ahead of time, hopefully they'll perform accordingly.
Your care for their passions and your interest in their preparedness shows them love and support. So, even if your kid doesn't end up as a future president of the United States, her dream and the endless array of imaginary speeches will prepare her for life as a successful adult regardless of the altered career path. She may even choose to do what you've done because she's seen the love you've had for your own job over the years.
Whatever comes out of these suggestions, never underestimate the investment you make in your child's future. Share some of your son or daughter's passions and dreams. We'd love to hear from you.
Labels: career, dreams, goals, kids, parents
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Small Goals
Sometimes the smallest goals can turn into tumbleweeds of effectiveness. If you make a tiny goal and actually attain it, you feel motivated to set another goal. If you achieve that one, you subsequently go for something bigger after that. The tumbleweed eventually grows so large that it takes over your neighborhood. Just kidding, but it could take over your life. Start out small and see what happens.
Here's an example. You have ten grand on your credit card and it feels like you just can't tackle it. You're making minimum payments but your additional charges keep augmenting the total balance. There's the unexpected car repair or the higher utility bill from running the a/c non-stop. Here's the plan: pay off the minimum amount plus fifty to one hundred extra dollars per month. That might not sound like a lot, but after ten months, you've paid down an extra $500-$1000. The key here is budgeting your expenses out so that you don't have to charge the extra stuff. If you've got a bit of a cushion, then you can use it for those unplanned incidentals.
If your goal is to pay off $500 extra per month, it might be too overwhelming. That's why I suggest starting out small. If your efforts turn into something even greater, then run with it. It just seems like a lot of people get defeated by their own great intentions and then end up deflated and left for dead. As the financial adviser Dave Ramsey suggests, pay down your lowest debts first, no matter what the interest rates. Then, you'll experience a snowball effect of enthusiasm. The result: you'll pay off more debt even faster. He'd even challenge you to pay off your house. Can you imagine not having a house payment? Amazing.
Another area of goal-setting deals with health. If you aim to lose five pounds, maybe you'll actually stick to it. No matter how much potential weight you have to lose, ten, twenty, or thirty pounds, just start slowly. If you set out to lose five pounds and actually accomplish the goal, you'll feel so proud of yourself that you'll keep at it. The next round might include five more pounds of weight-loss and then simply maintaining that weight for awhile.
Set realistic terms, so that you'll actually accomplish your goal. You can start out with a simple four step plan: 1) stop eating when you're full, 2) exercise three times a week (after consulting with your doctor if necessary), 3) try to substitute breakfast or lunch for a protein-packed breakfast bar or smoothie, and 4) try to limit your dessert consumption or that tasty glass of wine to every other night ('cuz those calories get pretty sneaky, especially when you're tired).
Maybe you've gone through a divorce or haven't quite found that dashing someone yet. Are you ready to get back out there and polish up those dancing shoes? Why not make a really basic goal and just see what happens? For starters, you could ask your good friends if there's someone they think of pairing you up with for a blind date. If you're not in to that kind of a scenario, then there's always E-harmony or other online dating services. You could set up two profiles next week and see if anything comes of it. That's it, something simple. Then, if something great happens, your confidence improves and you get out there the following month for that double date to the Jazz concert in the park. Think of the possibilities. If you don't swing the bat, you'll never hit the ball.
For those who are not single, maybe you need a bit more romance or connection in your own marriage or dating relationship. Go for baby steps there as well. Try making a date-night and actually sticking to it. This is a time where the two of you catch up together. Talk. Snuggle. Play a game. Watch a movie. Just make it your time. My husband and I rent a movie pretty much every Tuesday night, which might sound fairly boring. But, it's a special time where we know we're going to hang out, no matter what. A good friend of mine actually goes out every week for her date-night. I'm always amazed to hear about their exciting adventures.
Petite goals for your own personal development are great as well. Since I'm a writer, I submit articles to every possible venue on the planet. I'm not a vet, but I can write about my own cat, so I got a piece accepted to I Love Cats magazine. I'm a woman who values my faith, so I wrote a piece for Today's Christian Woman magazine. Sure, I get tons of rejections, but if I don't put myself out there, then I don't get any acceptances either. Likewise, I've enjoyed writing my own blog for three years now. Even before anyone actually read it, it felt good just to maintain that dream, which eventually snow-balled into bigger things.
Maybe your passion is photography. Why not take some shots and approach a local coffee shop to see if you could display a few pieces. Start out small. Maybe you could turn some of your images into greeting cards with your website printed on the back. It might not start out as an exhibition, but if the right person sees your work, it could lead to bigger opportunities. Your self confidence will increase and you'll set further objectives for your artwork as well.
Are you a talented musician? You could list yourself as a part-time instructor on Craig's List or at some local community centers. If you love being onstage, you could approach some coffee shops or some other public arenas for testing out your musical gift. If you're unsure of your musical prowess, then it's time to make one small step by signing up for beginning music lessons. Don't just limit yourself to singing in the shower. Don't let your kids' Barney guitar be the only one you strum. Keep it real by being true to yourself. Motivate yourself to sign up for a six week session. You might even love it and advance to level 2.
We'd love to hear from you. Have you set any small goals that turned into adventurous success stories? Encourage someone else by sharing your thoughts here.
Here's an example. You have ten grand on your credit card and it feels like you just can't tackle it. You're making minimum payments but your additional charges keep augmenting the total balance. There's the unexpected car repair or the higher utility bill from running the a/c non-stop. Here's the plan: pay off the minimum amount plus fifty to one hundred extra dollars per month. That might not sound like a lot, but after ten months, you've paid down an extra $500-$1000. The key here is budgeting your expenses out so that you don't have to charge the extra stuff. If you've got a bit of a cushion, then you can use it for those unplanned incidentals.
If your goal is to pay off $500 extra per month, it might be too overwhelming. That's why I suggest starting out small. If your efforts turn into something even greater, then run with it. It just seems like a lot of people get defeated by their own great intentions and then end up deflated and left for dead. As the financial adviser Dave Ramsey suggests, pay down your lowest debts first, no matter what the interest rates. Then, you'll experience a snowball effect of enthusiasm. The result: you'll pay off more debt even faster. He'd even challenge you to pay off your house. Can you imagine not having a house payment? Amazing.
Another area of goal-setting deals with health. If you aim to lose five pounds, maybe you'll actually stick to it. No matter how much potential weight you have to lose, ten, twenty, or thirty pounds, just start slowly. If you set out to lose five pounds and actually accomplish the goal, you'll feel so proud of yourself that you'll keep at it. The next round might include five more pounds of weight-loss and then simply maintaining that weight for awhile.
Set realistic terms, so that you'll actually accomplish your goal. You can start out with a simple four step plan: 1) stop eating when you're full, 2) exercise three times a week (after consulting with your doctor if necessary), 3) try to substitute breakfast or lunch for a protein-packed breakfast bar or smoothie, and 4) try to limit your dessert consumption or that tasty glass of wine to every other night ('cuz those calories get pretty sneaky, especially when you're tired).
Maybe you've gone through a divorce or haven't quite found that dashing someone yet. Are you ready to get back out there and polish up those dancing shoes? Why not make a really basic goal and just see what happens? For starters, you could ask your good friends if there's someone they think of pairing you up with for a blind date. If you're not in to that kind of a scenario, then there's always E-harmony or other online dating services. You could set up two profiles next week and see if anything comes of it. That's it, something simple. Then, if something great happens, your confidence improves and you get out there the following month for that double date to the Jazz concert in the park. Think of the possibilities. If you don't swing the bat, you'll never hit the ball.
For those who are not single, maybe you need a bit more romance or connection in your own marriage or dating relationship. Go for baby steps there as well. Try making a date-night and actually sticking to it. This is a time where the two of you catch up together. Talk. Snuggle. Play a game. Watch a movie. Just make it your time. My husband and I rent a movie pretty much every Tuesday night, which might sound fairly boring. But, it's a special time where we know we're going to hang out, no matter what. A good friend of mine actually goes out every week for her date-night. I'm always amazed to hear about their exciting adventures.
Petite goals for your own personal development are great as well. Since I'm a writer, I submit articles to every possible venue on the planet. I'm not a vet, but I can write about my own cat, so I got a piece accepted to I Love Cats magazine. I'm a woman who values my faith, so I wrote a piece for Today's Christian Woman magazine. Sure, I get tons of rejections, but if I don't put myself out there, then I don't get any acceptances either. Likewise, I've enjoyed writing my own blog for three years now. Even before anyone actually read it, it felt good just to maintain that dream, which eventually snow-balled into bigger things.
Maybe your passion is photography. Why not take some shots and approach a local coffee shop to see if you could display a few pieces. Start out small. Maybe you could turn some of your images into greeting cards with your website printed on the back. It might not start out as an exhibition, but if the right person sees your work, it could lead to bigger opportunities. Your self confidence will increase and you'll set further objectives for your artwork as well.
Are you a talented musician? You could list yourself as a part-time instructor on Craig's List or at some local community centers. If you love being onstage, you could approach some coffee shops or some other public arenas for testing out your musical gift. If you're unsure of your musical prowess, then it's time to make one small step by signing up for beginning music lessons. Don't just limit yourself to singing in the shower. Don't let your kids' Barney guitar be the only one you strum. Keep it real by being true to yourself. Motivate yourself to sign up for a six week session. You might even love it and advance to level 2.
We'd love to hear from you. Have you set any small goals that turned into adventurous success stories? Encourage someone else by sharing your thoughts here.
